Tag Archives: Thought

Break the Chains

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photo 5 (12)Break the chains that society has you bond by. That’s the goal. That’s the plan. Something that for most people is impossible. You have to be strong and united. Not easily fooled by the perception of beauty. Your beauty does not look lie mine. My beauty is divine and gorgeous. Don’t not hate on me, hate on yourself. Why don’t you love yourself as much as me. I love myself, I must keep telling myself. Don’t fall into those traps. The traps that society set. Can I be me and be beautiful, while you continue to do you.  I love me for me and I love you for you. As A culture we must learn to to love ourselves like no other would. Nobody will love me as much as I love myself. But I don’t love myself with all my flaws. I see the holes in my body. So many unfilled holes that I must learn to fill. Some way somehow, I pray to God that He helps me. I can’t do this on my own. I’m sick of crying at night, holding myself, asking myself why. Why do I continue to do the same things over and over again. Same set up, just a different guy. It feels like deja vu. Repeating the same day over and over again. It’s sickening and irritating. I wished I could stop the viscous cycle. Spining me around and around. Banging my head on all the walls. When is this cycle going to take me out. Will it be the end of me. I must not let it take me out. Can’t let it get the best of  you, they say. Don’t let your bad out weigh the good, Everybody has a bad day. But tomorrow is a brighter day, they say. Where is my brighter day. Am I not deserving enough.

 

-Jamekea S. Lee

Dark skin: What’s the Problem?

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It’s far easier to resent one’s own skin for giving you advantages you haven’t earned than despising it for what it takes away – Elizabeth Pears

In today society it common to heard compliments giving to women of light and fine brown skin tones. But it is rare for a women of darker skin to get complimented as much, unless they’re models with nearly perfect skin and a nice toned body. You know something alienated and different from women of lighter skin tones because “they’re pretty for a dark skin girl.”

I must say that I am one who sometimes envy both light skin and dark skin girls because of their beautiful aspects that I myself do not contain. I myself am a girl of the brown skin family, you know not too light, not too dark. However, I try and tend to distance myself from comparing my skin tone against others because over time I realized that I was doing nothing but giving into the mental illness. But it’s not easy.

Anyways here’s an interesting read about the light skin vs dark skin mentality.

http://www.newstatesman.com/society/2013/10/colourism-why-even-black-people-have-problem-dark-skin

Lives of Black Women in My Community

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“Look you see that ghetto black girl who is on welfare lives in North Philly and is always fighting.”

As a black woman in America I am often saddened by some of the things that I see on television and social media. I can not even fantom how many times I’ve scrolled down my Facebook timeline and seen many of my friends younger sisters acting a “fool.” Shaking their butts in front cameras, doing the dance to the new party songs that consist mostly of shaking they butts, singing songs that degrading to either themselves or putting women of different sizes down. It breaks my heart sometimes and sometimes I want to write “Stop, this is not acceptable. You should be presenting yourself in this manner. It’s embarrassing. Don’t follow in the same footsteps of your older sister,” but instead I just continue to scroll because I’m am not one for arguments. But do not get me wrong, I’m not scared to say something or to speak my mind and many people know this but I am not the person who embarrasses others over the internet.

While those young girls may be presenting themselves in ways that are considered embarrassing and degrading, I have grown to realize that they know exactly what their doing to themselves. Whenever I see them around the neighborhood and they come up to me and speak, I always ask them “Why are you doing that?” and they always give me the same answer “Huh? What you talking about?” and I say  “You know exactly what I’m talking about” they laugh and began to explain. Deep down inside I know that they appreciate those moments when I sit down and tell them to do better because if they didn’t they wouldn’t even talk to me anymore. And at the end of our conversations we always hug and I tell them to “be good,” and they smile and say “I’m always good.”

To them they see nothing wrong in the actions they do or have committed and to me I see nothing wrong. But to society they’re considered to be uneducated and embarrassing to their race and they become a statistic of “Look you see that ghetto black girl who is on welfare lives in North Philly and is always fighting.” They are not those girls and they and I both know that but it’s too bad that society does not.

-Jamekea S. Lee

Society is Evil

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Society is evil, it tells us what is beautiful and if you’re not what they consider beautiful then you’re just scum. Society tells us that beautiful is being skinny, have a light skin tone, straight teeth, straight hair, big boobs and a nice ass. Society is judgmental and abusive. It’s beats us down when we can not fit into it’s perfect example.

Why must I be thin, have perfect skin, have ass and tits?

I’m thin, sure. I’m skinny, I don’t gain wait. Because I have a fast metabolism.

Perfect skin. No, not I my friend. In my dreams.

Have ass and tits.  Nah, I don’t have neither of those.

So according to society, I’m not beautiful because I can not fit into every category.

And you my friend, you’re not pretty because you do not fit into every category. But those supermodels, cheerleaders, and strippers and what not, they’re beautiful. They’re beautiful because society judges us by our looks not by our intelligence. Society is evil and unfair. I’m tired of the bulls*** it puts us through. Why can’t an average teenager like me be consider pretty or just even worth something in our society? Answer me this.

Society loves knocking down our self esteem, to makes us feel worthless. But it’s up to us to allow how far the knock us down. It’s up to us to duck and dodge the jabs. Because you my friend, you skinny girl with freckles, you big girl with a nice face, you ginger, you African American, you Caucasian, you Asian, you Chinese, you ordinary person reading this blog, you are beautiful.  We, us ordinary people who live in the shadows must enter into the sun and show society, that we are something extraordinary and that society can kiss our ass.

Who am I ?

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If I share my stories

I wonder how many people would listen?

How many people would understand my written words?

Would they believe that I’ve gone through so much at an age I am?

I highly doubt people will react.

But I guess I can try

To catch a few people attention

Hope they’ll understand me.

Don’t judge me

Keep your comments to yourself

Both the good and the bad.

Because when I spoke there wasn’t much confidence.

And I don’t need you to shatter my knees,

So I have to look up to you with fear in my eyes.

I don’t know whether or not you’ll get others to criticize me.

Chastise me.

Belittle me so I feel like nothing.

Because when I share my stories there won’t be much confidence.

But I’ll like to keep the little bit I do have.

So please I ask of you

Don’t criticize me

Just listen and try to understand

What I’m going through

Just lend me an ear

And a small fraction of your heart

I know I can be hard and difficult to talk to.

But that’s because I built up this wall that I need help tearing down

I’m afraid of getting hurt.

More than I already have

But if you give me time

I’ll tell you eventually.

You just have to be willing to stand by me for however long it takes  for me to come clean.

Which can take months or even years.

I’ll tell you

How it feel and how I felt

Don’t judge me when I do

Because I was young and foolish

I didn’t know right from wrong

Good vs evil.

I evil take over

Get the best of me.

That was my past

This is my present.

I’m changed

A changed person

And everyday

I try to make it better

But when I truly become who I am,

Then I’ll tell you who I was