Tag Archives: A Woman’s Worth

Who am I? 2016

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I am more than the color of my skin

I am more than the texture of my hair

The crookedness of my teeth

I am more than a woman…

Who am I?

Even I do not know

All I know is that I feel more

I believe more

I dream more

I breathe more…

Truth is… The more I think about who I am… The more I realize I don’t know

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4a01e67a982141812ce8ff256032d2deI believe, that beauty comes from within.

It’s something that we, ourselves must embrace and understand before we allow anyone else to tell us the standards of beauty.

We should be able to define our beauty in our own terms with no one telling us how high or how low we should set the bar.

When we define our own terms of what beauty is then we will finally be able to live in our truths. Knowing that no amount of makeup will be able to define us. Because we know that underneath is it is somebody who is beautiful. Somebody who breaks all the barriers of standard beauty.

Beauty is knowing that you are beautiful and not letting anyone standardize you!

 

What is beauty?

Break the Chains

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photo 5 (12)Break the chains that society has you bond by. That’s the goal. That’s the plan. Something that for most people is impossible. You have to be strong and united. Not easily fooled by the perception of beauty. Your beauty does not look lie mine. My beauty is divine and gorgeous. Don’t not hate on me, hate on yourself. Why don’t you love yourself as much as me. I love myself, I must keep telling myself. Don’t fall into those traps. The traps that society set. Can I be me and be beautiful, while you continue to do you.  I love me for me and I love you for you. As A culture we must learn to to love ourselves like no other would. Nobody will love me as much as I love myself. But I don’t love myself with all my flaws. I see the holes in my body. So many unfilled holes that I must learn to fill. Some way somehow, I pray to God that He helps me. I can’t do this on my own. I’m sick of crying at night, holding myself, asking myself why. Why do I continue to do the same things over and over again. Same set up, just a different guy. It feels like deja vu. Repeating the same day over and over again. It’s sickening and irritating. I wished I could stop the viscous cycle. Spining me around and around. Banging my head on all the walls. When is this cycle going to take me out. Will it be the end of me. I must not let it take me out. Can’t let it get the best of  you, they say. Don’t let your bad out weigh the good, Everybody has a bad day. But tomorrow is a brighter day, they say. Where is my brighter day. Am I not deserving enough.

 

-Jamekea S. Lee

How I Learned to Love Myself

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My years through middle school and high school were very stressful at times. I wasn’t comfortable with who I was because my skin wasn’t smooth and clear. I had many blemishes, scars, acne all over my face, chest and back, and I had a an excessive sweating problem. I used to wear shirts that would cover up most of my top and arms because I didn’t want people to see my acne. However, even though I would shirts to had my acne they would only make my excessive sweating more visible. For the longest time I was conflicted on what problem I wanted to hide more but whatever problem I chose to hide people still noticed.

People would still look and ask questions like why you sweat so much, what’s wrong with you body and all I could say was that I had a lot of medical problems because I had no other answers. So to hide everything I would wear sweaters and jackets all the time and when they asked why I would say because I was cold. However, that only worked for so long because my body started to get easily and I used to faint and pass out so I started wearing crop tops and shirts without sleeves because it would help with my excessive sweating but it would make my acne more noticeable. And people would start talking about my body again.

However, after a while I became fed up with what over people was saying about my body. I began to realize that my body wasn’t perfect and was never going to be perfect so I might as well learn to love myself for who I was because it’s who I’m going to be forever. Even though the process was hard and difficult because people who I thought was my friends continued to talk and my problem, I found people who shared common problems with me and they’re helping my love myself even more.

-Jamekea S. Lee

Light Skinned Girls

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As I was scrolling down my Instagram timeline, I stumbled across this picture. At first I thought it was very funny because I’ve read and seen many of the “how light skin girls are” tweets and pictures. However, after reading what I read recently about how the light skin vs dark skin propaganda started I became disgusted. It made me upset to see how the talk about people of the light skin tone. People are making up memes that used to but other people down. It’s a mockery of women because they’re making fun of how some girls act. They are turning it into something much bigger than what it may seem to them.

To them it’s just fun and games but to others it may be hurtful because they are now categorized by the stereotypes. They are constantly being compared to people of other skin tones. People are even using it as a term of expression. I have a friend who would text me and when I didn’t text but he would say that “you acting light skin.” At first I found it funny because I would argue back that I’m not light skin, I’m brown skin so how am I acting like something I’m not. However, over time it began to get really annoying because the more he kept saying it the more I realized that I was being compared to somebody else.

I never realized that small things like this could be very hurtful. Even though many people try to hide or push away they fact that it bothers them, deep down inside it may truly hurt them. I feel as though our generation should be more considerate of other people’s feelings. I wish that our generation would educate themselves more about the memes that are being used because everything has a meaning behind it. Many which are racist.

-Jamekea S. Lee

Media vs Women 2013

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I ran across this really interesting video on Youtube, it pointed out some of the ways that women were lifted up during 2013, even though there were only like five ways but it also contrasted them of how they were still degraded by the media.

It’s interesting, watch it please!!!

 

Women vs Society

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In today’s world women are constantly picked and teased about the way that they appear. The standards of a woman are highly and are undeniable impossible for any one woman to conquer. Not every woman will be able to fit the “required” standards. Some will but know that most women will not. They will always to be missing one aspect whether it be big or small, it will still somehow be noticeable to some critic in society and the biggest if them, herself.

As women, we are constantly trying to be better than another. Whether it be with hair, clothes, shoes, cars and rings, we are constantly competing. We are constantly competing because we feel that if we don’t have what someone else’s have, we’re of less value. We’re aren’t the trophy, that somebody would compete for. All of those feelings and thoughts of not being good enough all comes from what we see in society. What we see on billboards and commercials. They are all telling us, that we aren’t good enough if we don’t have this or that. But they’re telling us that without even saying those things. But we know what they’re doing because that little voice in the back of our mind is warning us ” be careful, don’t believe what they say.” While that little voice is right and we’ll listen to it sometimes, there comes the time when we give in.

We give into the temptation of thinking that maybe that person is right maybe what they’re saying is true. If I lower my standards and change the color of my hair and how I look maybe then I’ll be wanted and accepted. But once we give into those temptations there is no coming back from it. Maybe we’ll learn how ignore it and learn to love ourselves more but we will always think of the what ifs. It’s hard to move on from the bad habits and even harder to for better ones because once we grow accustom to somehow, it’s there, always and forever.

Please believe me when I say “don’t you believe those how I changed stories.” Those people have been changed from their old ways but they still think about how they used to be. There is no way to forgot about who you were before. It will always be there in the back of your mind to pop up and remind you. We may feel embarrassed but it’s natural because we didn’t know better in those days.

The key is to use what you been through to move on for a better future. We must remember the times when we were young fools because we thought it would be cool and teach our daughters to do better. We must teach our daughters to love themselves for who they are. No matter their color, no matter their size, no matter anything because as long as they can love who they are it doesn’t matter what others say about their skin and hair. We must also remember to tell them that it will not be easy and that it gets hard sometimes but never give up. We will all hit a few bumps in the road but never give up because the outcome in the long run will be greater.

-Jamekea S. Lee

Dark skin: What’s the Problem?

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It’s far easier to resent one’s own skin for giving you advantages you haven’t earned than despising it for what it takes away – Elizabeth Pears

In today society it common to heard compliments giving to women of light and fine brown skin tones. But it is rare for a women of darker skin to get complimented as much, unless they’re models with nearly perfect skin and a nice toned body. You know something alienated and different from women of lighter skin tones because “they’re pretty for a dark skin girl.”

I must say that I am one who sometimes envy both light skin and dark skin girls because of their beautiful aspects that I myself do not contain. I myself am a girl of the brown skin family, you know not too light, not too dark. However, I try and tend to distance myself from comparing my skin tone against others because over time I realized that I was doing nothing but giving into the mental illness. But it’s not easy.

Anyways here’s an interesting read about the light skin vs dark skin mentality.

http://www.newstatesman.com/society/2013/10/colourism-why-even-black-people-have-problem-dark-skin

Lives of Black Women in My Community

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“Look you see that ghetto black girl who is on welfare lives in North Philly and is always fighting.”

As a black woman in America I am often saddened by some of the things that I see on television and social media. I can not even fantom how many times I’ve scrolled down my Facebook timeline and seen many of my friends younger sisters acting a “fool.” Shaking their butts in front cameras, doing the dance to the new party songs that consist mostly of shaking they butts, singing songs that degrading to either themselves or putting women of different sizes down. It breaks my heart sometimes and sometimes I want to write “Stop, this is not acceptable. You should be presenting yourself in this manner. It’s embarrassing. Don’t follow in the same footsteps of your older sister,” but instead I just continue to scroll because I’m am not one for arguments. But do not get me wrong, I’m not scared to say something or to speak my mind and many people know this but I am not the person who embarrasses others over the internet.

While those young girls may be presenting themselves in ways that are considered embarrassing and degrading, I have grown to realize that they know exactly what their doing to themselves. Whenever I see them around the neighborhood and they come up to me and speak, I always ask them “Why are you doing that?” and they always give me the same answer “Huh? What you talking about?” and I say  “You know exactly what I’m talking about” they laugh and began to explain. Deep down inside I know that they appreciate those moments when I sit down and tell them to do better because if they didn’t they wouldn’t even talk to me anymore. And at the end of our conversations we always hug and I tell them to “be good,” and they smile and say “I’m always good.”

To them they see nothing wrong in the actions they do or have committed and to me I see nothing wrong. But to society they’re considered to be uneducated and embarrassing to their race and they become a statistic of “Look you see that ghetto black girl who is on welfare lives in North Philly and is always fighting.” They are not those girls and they and I both know that but it’s too bad that society does not.

-Jamekea S. Lee

Beauty Paradox Reblog

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http://read.bi/18sAoOM

Check out this article. A few thing it points out is that:

  • Women’s worth is still measured by attractiveness while men define success by power, money and intelligence.
  • For men gray hair symbolize wisdom, for women it symbolize old age.
  • Society defines women’s beauty as youth.